The world of co-parenting can be stressful. Navigating through tight schedules, communicating effectively, and grappling with various parenting styles may take a toll on you. And with the current global health crisis, co-parenting becomes awfully exhausting. But separated, non-dating, or divorced parents can excel in raising their children while far apart. Getting there isn’t easy, but with a few tweaks, everything is achievable. I know this from personal experience-My parents separated and divorced when I was young; in terms of co-parenting, it was very different back in the early ’90s. My Dad moved away, so my Mum became our main caregiver us visiting him fortnightly. There were no mobile phones, no emails; it was all face to face or over the telephone. Even the divorce itself was way more testing than it would be in this day and age, as we can now go to peters and may (or whatever divorce solicitor you want) for legal advice with ease. My parents didn’t have that. We are, however, living in very different times, and I have seen the positives of co-parenting. So now, onto the nuts and bolts; here are effective co-parenting tips.
Accept the Other Partner is Still Your Child’s Parent
Divorce can cause resentment, and you might not stand your partner. It’s your sole responsibility to ensure your kid(s) has a healthy, loving relationship with their other parent. Offhand comments, belittling, and snide remarks towards your partner are uncalled for.
Allow your children to develop and grow off the reflection of your feelings. Remember, separation is between the two adults and not children and their parents.
Create a Shared Family Calendar
Creating a calendar keeps you organised for effective communication and coordination. The calendar can be shared online for easy accessibility by both parents. It allows everyone to stay abreast of social and school events, sports schedules, and even medical appointments.
It can also strengthen your teamwork in raising your children. Make the communication short, precise, and amicable. You can download an app or use a shared Google calendar.
Your Child Should Never be an Intermediary
As a responsible parent, establish a form of communication. Phone, email, or text conversations might lead to miscommunications. Never make your child a go-between or messenger.
In this case, you can utilise co-parenting apps for easy and reliable communication with your partner. Moreover, it makes you provide comfort for your children, and they feel safe with any parent available.
Sometimes You Disagree to Agree
Sometimes you may feel like caving in to appease your ex. You may also feel hopeless if they disagree with your opinion. Know that there is no winner or loser in parenting battles.
Bring up children who experience parents disagreeing but amicably. This harmonious unit keeps the kid’s welfare in the spotlight.
If there are instances that seem hard for both of you, you may seek help from a professional. Talk to family law solicitors who can offer the best litigation advice for successful co-parenting.
Be Kind, Respectful, and Consistent
Your differences with an ex can never benefit your child or children. Instead, it’ll make co-parenting a hurdle hard to conquer. And sadly, kids suffer the most.
Give your kids a greater deal of safety and stability. When co-parenting, create a joint agreement on social rules, computer and phone use agreements, and even visitation. When agreements are stable, reasonable, and safe, everyone feels safe and comfortable.
Your Primary Directive is to Love Your Child More
Feeling hatred towards your ex after a divorce is normal. However, you need to identify what your child needs and offer unmatched support. Every parent should focus on ensuring the children’s development needs are met.
The Bottom Line for effective co-parenting
Effective co-parenting is not easy, but it’s doable. Both parents should sacrifice and forgo their indifferences for the sake of the child. Remember, teamwork makes dreams work!
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